Single this Valentine’s Day? We’ve got you Covered! 5 February 2019 Bliss Team No comments Categories: Individual Therapy, Inspiration, Relationship Therapy, Relationships, Self Care, Therapy As Valentine’s Day is fast approaching, it’s hard not to notice stores filling up their shelves with chocolates, stuffies, cards and everything pink and red. For those that soak up all the fun, loving, mushy sentiments, Valentine’s Day can be great! But what about those of you who are riding solo this year? Here are 5 ways to help navigate this Hallmark holiday: Check in with yourself.What emotions is this day bringing up for you? Once you have identified if there are any lingering feelings that you haven’t dealt with, you can begin to make space to process them. Whether it’s sadness, loneliness, relief or happiness, what are you feeling? Are you holding on to a past relationship, lover, experience, etc.? What do you need to heal and move forward? Valentine’s Day can stir this pot, so make sure you are being honest with where you are at, and what you need. Check in with your friends.Who else is in the same boat as you? Sometimes it can be helpful to know that there are others feeling the same way. Do you have other single friends that you could connect with? Or maybe even friends that are in relationships that don’t celebrate Valentine’s Day? Think about getting together and going out for a movie, dinner, paint night, dancing, a spa day, a yoga session or a killer spin class. If going out isn’t your thing, maybe you could have a low key night at home, or invite friends over for dinner or to hang out on the couch catching up. All my friends are coupled up, so now what do I do? Do something for yourself!Buy yourself those special chocolates you were eyeing earlier at the grocery store, take yourself out for dinner or order in your favourite dish. Do something that will make you feel good and empowered. We are our own worst enemies, and we can get wrapped up or lost in our own thoughts and self-judgments. Be kind to yourself and give yourself a break. Remember that you are worthy of love and healthy relationships, but being single can be celebrated just as much as being coupled up; and Valentine’s Day gives you the opportunity for self-reflection and well-deserved me time! Check in with your family.Maybe you could use this day to have dinner with your parents, or to spend time with a grandparent. Do you have any nieces or nephews? Maybe you could babysit them while their parents go out. It could be fun to do cheesy crafts again, or decorate some heart shaped goodies! Limit social media.We all have those friends on our Facebook or Instagram feeds who create over the top posts on how great their partner is, and how loved they are. While that may be something they feel is important for them to share on their platform, it can feed challenging or unhelpful thoughts that you may be experiencing. Social media has the tendency to contribute to our need to compare where our friends are at in their lives and relationships with where we are. So, if you think you may feel triggered by seeing what your friends are sharing on Valentines Day, don’t spend as much time scrolling! There isn’t a clear path to avoiding Valentine’s Day altogether, but there are definitely ways to help you navigate the day and get out on the other side. If you really do find yourself struggling with where you’re at right now and need someone to talk to, you can always connect with one of us here at Bliss Counselling. Do you need some ideas of solo activities, or things to do with friends this Valentine’s Day? Check out these websites for things to do around KW! https://www.ammayoga.ca (Restorative yoga? Yes please!) https://www.hustlandflow.com/home (Kick boxing, spin classes, yoga and juice bar) https://www.socialart.ca (Get your paint on) https://www.dejavusalonandspa.ca (Pamper yourself) https://www.thewatersspa.com (Making me time) https://www.ginaspa.com (Focusing on yourself) http://adventurerooms.ca(Grab a team and try to escape these rooms) https://batlgrounds.com/axe-throwing-kitchener/ (Let it go!) https://www.ctrlv.ca/ctrl-v-waterloo-flagship/ (Whoa!) https://www.cineplex.com/Theatre/cineplex-cinemas-kitchener-and-vip?utm_source=google&utm_medium=organic&utm_campaign=local&utm_content=CPXKitchenerVIP (Drinks, food, movies, sounds like a plan) https://apollocinema.ca (A gem kind of spot) http://www.princesscinemas.com (And they have a café too!) https://www.facebook.com/PatentSocial/ (Super Mario!) https://www.acepingponglounge.com (Ping Pong) http://www.crossroadscafe.ca (Board games) http://www.gamesontap.ca (More board games) Written by Bliss sexologist Lindsay Kenna. Learn more about Lindsay and get her secret “Tips From the Couch” here.
How To Keep Things Spicy When You’re A Bit Vanilla 14 February 2017 Bliss Team No comments Categories: Relationships, Sex Therapy, Sexual Wellness With all of the hype surrounding the release of 50 Shades Darker, I’m betting that there are many couples wondering if it is time to break out the floggers and paddles and ditch the stale sex routine. Floggers and paddles can be great if that’s your thing, but some people just aren’t that adventurous. And the great news is that you don’t have to be! There are many other ways to heat things up with your partner this Valentines Day. Here are a few suggestions to help you mix things up in the bedroom: Change things up! Simple as that. Little differences can make big differences. If you typically have sex in the evening when it’s dark, try having sex in the morning when your whole room is lit up. Do you have time for a lunch quickie? No one says that sex has to be an all night marathon! Lunch dates are the perfect excuse to meet with each other. And hey, you get to go back to the office with a big smile on your face! Lucky you! Change positions. Do you find yourself describing sex as vanilla, robotic or routine? Maybe it’s time to try out the positions you’ve always been curious about. No one says it has to be Kama Sutra level fun, but is there a favourite position you have that you haven’t done in a while or one that you’ve been eager to try? Go for it! Change places. Is the bedroom really the only place to have sex? Definitely not. What about the bathroom, a table, a counter top, a couch, or the office desk? Play with different textures too, like on top of a super soft blanket or under the shower. Focus on your senses. Which is the most erotic for you? Do you like the way your partner tastes or that one perfume or body wash they use? Do you like to play music or burn certain candles? Do you like it when your partner whispers in your ear, moans out loud or touches you a certain way? Try to connect with the sense that excites you the most. Flirt with each other throughout the day. Send those sexy text messages and pictures. If you tend to be on the shy side, this is a great way to get your partner in the mood long before you get to see them. Surprise your partner. Wear that sexy lingerie you have been eyeing in the shop window, or make the experience all about your partner for one night. Again, it doesn’t have to be anything too dramatic – little surprises can be great surprises! What about focusing on foreplay and enjoying every part of your partner’s body? Foreplay and passionate make out sessions can be hot and feel different for anyone whose sexual script usually skips. SLOW DOWN! Show each other how much you love each other’s bodies through different ways of kissing, licking, touching and feeling one another. If you are usually reluctant to talk about your fantasies, why not use Valentines Day as the perfect excuse to share with each other some of the sexy thoughts you’ve been keeping to yourself. Talking to each other about your fantasies can be very erotic! You don’t need to bring in sex toys if that’s not your thing. But if it is something you are curious about then take some time to research what kinds of toys you would like to try, and discuss it with your partner. Shopping for them together can be the first step in setting up a pretty exciting and new experience for both of you. Lastly, just have a good time with whatever you do! Be silly, laugh, and have fun being adventurous in your own unique ways. Happy Valentines Day lovers! Lindsay Kenna